Why You Should Focus on Mindset if You Want to Be Happier

Why should you focus on your mindset if you want to flip your life?

Too often we are focused on our external circumstances when we think about being happier. We will be happier when we get the kitchen renovated, get that promotion at work, or finally lose the extra fifteen pounds from that last pregnancy nine years ago. But, the truth is, none of those things have the power to make people happy. Instead, we just need to flip our thinking—aka our mindset! Only by focusing on your mindset can you feel happier.

focusonmindset.jpg

 

Your mindset has profound effects on everything: self-esteem, health, relationships, and careers. Your mindset is even more powerful than your circumstances in setting the course of your life, and in terms of how happy and content you feel.  Unlike random circumstances, mindset is something you can learn to control and change. With some specific activities and intentions, you can radically flip your reactions to common experiences in your life.

 

But, as with any change, it’s tough. Every day we have to scroll though endless bad news in our social media feeds, or yet another natural disaster somewhere in the world. But what affects us even more is that nagging voice in our heads that are constantly whining, “I’m so tired,” “I’m fat,” “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

 

And when you feel crappy, you radiate crappy, and you attract crappy. I’m sure you’ve heard of the Law of Attraction, that law that says your negative mindset will just keep attracting more negativity in your life. Well, it’s true. And once you focus on your mindset, you’ll see just how powerful the Law of Attraction is. So, stop using it against you, and start using it as your tool to flip your life.

 

Sadly, we often miss seeing the wonderful things in our life.  You know the old saying, “Stop and smell the roses.” Well, do you? I mean seriously, do you? How often do you take a walk and truly appreciate nature? Watching the sunrise or the sunset is an awe-inspiring thing. It’s 100% free, and it happens Every. Single. Day. And yet, we miss it.


Why is it so damn hard to stay in that happy, positive place?

Journaling is a great way to focus on mindset

Journaling is a great way to focus on mindset

 

Because thought patterns are learned, and once they are ingrained in your mind, your mind tries to keep you in that space. The more you allow yourself to repeat negative thoughts, the more ingrained these thoughts become in your mind, and the harder it is to flip those thoughts and your mindset. If you want to flip your life, you must focus on your mindset so that you can be happier and more content. And they way to do that is to train your brain. If you want a fit body, you need to train. If you want a fit mind, you need to train, as well.

 

But how? Well, I’m glad you asked. I’ve created a super-simple, 5-Day 40yearflip Mindset Challenge to get you flipping that mindset from negative to positive. It’s easy and painless, and totally FREE. And, it’s designed to make it easy for you to start focusing on mindset and actively working to flip that mindset from negative to positive.


If you want to create great things in your life, then you have to start by expecting yourself to achieve great things. Ready?  Let’s do this! Click on the link below to join, and an email from me will zoom straight to your inbox.



 

Flip Your Mornings from Frantic to Fantastic with a Morning Routine

Give Yourself the Time and Space to Implement a Morning Routine

Give Yourself the Time and Space to Implement a Morning Routine

Having a good, solid, morning routine that nurtures from the very start of your day, is one of the best ways to practice self care, and to get your day of to a calm, good-vibe start. There’s only one thing that’s hard about starting a morning routine, and that’s actually starting a morning routine. As they say, the first step’s a doozy.

I know that most of us, first thing in the morning, want nothing more than to just keep sleeping. However, I promise you, if you make this small flip, from snoozing-button-pushing, to giving yourself the gift of extra you-time in the morning, you will come to love your morning routine.

Like most things, morning routines are personal. What works for one person, won’t work for another person. So, my 40yearflip friends, I’ll just toss a few ideas at you and, you decide which of these would work best for you.

Get Cozy with Your Favorite Morning Beverage

Whether you drink coffee or tea in the morning, you can make this part of your self care ritual. Don’t do as I used to and pour your caffeine fix into your to-go cup and chug it down in the car on the way to work. That’s not enjoying your morning beverage; that’s gulping it down just for the caffeine jolt.

Morning Routine as Self Care

Everything you eat and drink should be consumed for the health of your body, or to enjoy the taste, the temperature, the texture, and the experience food and drink can give you. Savor your bites and your sips, always. 


Try to have your first cup of coffee in the morning all alone and in silence. Make it just the way you like it. Serve it to yourself in your favorite mug and savor it. Really, savor your drink. Take a minute to appreciate the smell and taste.


You can read the paper, write in your journal, or sit on your patio and listen to the birds chirping as the sun comes up while you enjoy your beverage. This is another great reason to wake up a little earlier than everyone else in your household. You will be amazed at how much better you feel with just a few minutes to yourself.

Spend a Some Time with a Book


If you can set your alarm for an earlier time, it gives you the chance to catch up on your reading. Find a book that is inspirational and helps motivate you for the day. In the morning, I tend to reach for self-development books or other nonfiction. I like to be inspired in the mornings. I save fiction for the evenings.


Read just a few pages or a whole chapter, depending on how much free time you have. This can be while you are having your morning coffee, or if you are listening to an audiobook, during your morning walk. This gives you some time in the morning to not worry about what’s ahead, or get stuck in planning mode. 


Avoid the Internet 


You want isn’t self care? Doing what almost everyone does when they have a few minutes in the morning, getting online. Stressing yourself out over work email is the opposite of self care. Reading they typos in Donald Trump’s tweets is the opposite of self care. The same goes for checking your calendar, reading the news, and scrolling Facebook. Flip this behavior right on out of your life.


There’s plenty of time, later in the day to do all those things. When you are trying to start a new morning routine for self care purposes, you should unplug all devices. Don’t spoil your morning by letting your cell phone feed you stress. I put my cell phone on Do Not Disturb mode before I go to bed, and I don’t take it off until I’ve officially started my work day. 


Meditate for Ten Minutes


The morning is also the ideal time to meditate and repeat mantras. Mantras are sayings or words that help to center your focus and make it easier to meditate. You can also try breathing exercises or traditional meditation. If you want to take a walk in the morning, that can also help you to meditate.


What does your morning routine look like? Be honest! It’s ok if it’s less than zen right now. We are all here to learn and flip those habits. Tell us below so we can be inspired (or, if your morning routine is in progress, so we can commiserate!) Got a great pic of what your mornings look like? Tag us on IG with #40yearflip

How to Slay Your Goals and Avoid Overwhelm

Flip: From #AllTheThings to Focused Goal Setting and Achieving

Slay Your Goals and Avoid Overwhelm with the One Flip At A Time Method

Slay Your Goals and Avoid Overwhelm with the One Flip At A Time Method

Let me guess, you’ve got plans. Big ones. Goals too—lots of them.

You start with a small plan, and then you think and think about it, and your little plan to becomes #allthethings!. For example, say you decide that you are going to start eating healthy. And, after you decide on this pretty vague, general goal, your plan to eat healthy has suddenly morphed into something like this:

I’m going to wake up every morning at 5am, go for a 5 mile jog, while listening to self-help audiobooks, and plan out my entire week while running, and while listening to the self-help audiobooks. Then, when I get home, I’m going to make a kale shake with every superfood known to man blended up in it, and take some supplements, and then I’m going to pack another shake to take to work, because I’m never going to have take out every again for the rest of my life. Like ever.

And then, at work, on my lunch break, I’m going to powerwalk around the parking lot while chugging my health shake and listening to more self-help audiobooks. And then, after work, I’m going to go to the gym and join pilates, yoga, spinning, indoor paddleboarding, and sign up to run a marathon. Or better, yet, I’ll sign up to run every marathon in America! 

And then what happens? 

·      You don’t do any of it because you are overcome with overwhelm. 

·      You blame yourself for not achieving any of your goals. 

·      You end up feeling like poo poo about yourself. And then you eat 2 pints of ice cream, while binge watching HGTV, all the while, beating yourself up with negative, self-deprecating thoughts. 

Sound familiar?

I know it does, because we all go through this.

You are not alone. You are not defective. You are not bad at sticking to plans. You are not unable to reach goals. 

You just got caught in the cycle of #allthethings!.

We all want to be our best. And our brain sometimes tricks us, and sets us up for failure, but trying to rush us into being our ideal self.

But no worries, because I’m going to tell you exactly what’s happening in that well-meaning brain of yours, and, most importantly, how to flip those thoughts it so you can slay your goals, every time with the one-flip-at-a-time method.

Slay Your Goals

Yes, your brain means well. It’s trying to make you be your best self. But, often, in this pursuit, it kicks into overdrive, and lays out a plan that, when executed correctly, takes time. 

So what’s the solution? How can you flip from #AllTheThings to focused goal setting and achieving with the one-flip-at-a-time method?

1.   The first step is to recognize when your brain flips into #allthethings! mode. 

2.   Next, tell yourself to stop the cycle. 

3.   Understand that your self-worth is not dependent upon whether or not you can manage #allthethings! or not. Don’t value yourself so low. 

4.   Now, it’s time to actually tackle the initial goal. Likely, when you decide to take on #allthethings!, you actually started with a small goal in mind, before you let your brain go into perfectionism mode. Focus on that one small thing. Set out a single, achievable goal for yourself, and a realistic timeline to work toward and achieve that goal.

For example, say you decide that you’re going to make yourself a kale and berry shake every weeknight before bed, so that in the morning, when you are rushing to get ready, your healthy breakfast is ready for you. You don’t need to think about it. The work was done the night before. Great. That is a single, attainable goal.

Set out to slay it. Repeat this one goal until it becomes a habit--until you do this naturally as part of your evening and morning routine.

5.   Once this habit is firmly in place, add in a second goal. Let’s say you are firmly in the habit of making your weekday shakes at night, and drinking them every morning. Now, what is the next small, attainable goal you can work into your routine? Do you want to add in 20 minutes of walking in the morning? Add it in.

Once that goal has been reached, and the morning walk has become part of your daily routine, you could choose to add in a 3rd, attainable goal. And so on and so forth, until you are slaying it forever and always.

6.   Avoid the temptation of #allthethings!. Once you have reached a milestone, your brain is going to try to convince you to that you can handle adding in a few more goals, and speeding up your timeline. Do not fall for it. Keep your momentum slow and steady. Be the tortoise, not the hare!

7.   Do not let your #allthethings! brain convince you that small victories are not enough. Be proud of every victory, every reached goal. In fact, be proud of every attempt at reaching a goal. 

8.   Do not criticize yourself too harshly if you don’t perfect every goal, every time. Instead, celebrate your small wins, and forgive yourself for small missteps. If you do miss a goal. Shake it off and try again.

Keep that momentum going!

Flipping from #allthethings! to focused goal setting and achieving takes practice and patience with yourself. But it is worth it. You are training yourself to be a goal-slaying master.

Implement this one-flip-at-a-time method every time you want to achieve something. By using this method, you rewire your brain and train it to slay goals in a focused and organized manner, designed to set you up for success. And, once you start slaying those goals, you will learn to think of yourself as a goal slayer, which in turn, will make it even easier to continue on your journey to a better you.

You have it in you to slay those goals. I believe in you. What are you big goals, and how can you slay them by flipping from #allthethings! to focused goal setting and achieving? Lay them out in the comments! And then hit the slay button.

Did someone say slay button? Well, here it is! I’ve made a handy-dandy worksheet, just for you, so that you can flip from#AllTheThings to focused goal setting and achieving, no matter what your goals are.



 

5 Fast Self Care Flips for Women Who Think They’re Too Busy

Flip: From Frazzled to Nurtured in No Time

Self Care: Spending Time with Pets is Good for your Soul and for your Pets’ Too

Self Care: Spending Time with Pets is Good for your Soul and for your Pets’ Too

Technically, we all know how important self care is for women, especially women over 40, who are constantly juggling more than they can handle. But, for busy women, self-care can feel like a luxury that we never have time for.

We’ve been fooled into thinking about spending time, energy, and money on self care as indulgent or selfish. I am here to tell you, right here, right now, flip those self-limiting thoughts and start telling yourself that self care is a vital habit to work into your daily schedule.

A major factor holding women back from practicing self care is they think they need to do something extravagant in order for it to count, or to work, or whatever. Repeat after me, this is not true. Self care doesn’t have to consist of extravagant, long weekends spent at the beach, a trip to the spa, or even taking those crazy expensive Soul Cycle classes. But, hey, if you can swing those things, have at it!

The truth is, self care can be anything (small or big) you do to give you and your body and or mind attention. I want you to take 10 minutes a day, every day this week, to spend on yourself. In fact, I insist.

Here are 5 self-care flips that will take only 10 minutes out of your crazy schedule, but will still benefit your mind and body. Flip to it, girl.

1. S-T-R-E-T-C-H it Out

Do you know that we tend to carry stress in our spines? This is especially true for those of us who spend long hours hunched over the computer, working on our feet, or picking up after the kids. Like many things in our busy lives, our posture and body take the backseat.

I know that when you get home, after you’ve made dinner, and ran all your errands, all you want to do is flop on the couch and flip through Instagram, or curl up with a good book. But, flip that habit. Just before you get ready for chill-out time, take just ten minutes to curl your spine down, and touch your toes. 

Self Care for Women Over 40: Stretching

If you can touch your toes, great, set a goal to be able to touch your palms to the ground by the end of next month. If you can’t touch your toes (don’t worry, no one needs to know!) no worries, most women over 40 haven’t been able to touch their toes in a long, long time. But you’ve got this! I believe in you.

Set a goal to be able to touch your toes in 3 months. Remember, any amount of stretching will do your aching joints and body some long-lasting good. Put that goal in your journal or on your reminders app in your phone.

While you’re at it, stretch the rest of your body as well. Perhaps you can look up a yoga posture, or you have a stretching routine in mind already. Whether it is advanced or basic, any kind of stretching will keep your body functioning well despite periods of inactivity. Touch your toes, extend your arms and gear yourself up physically and mentally for whatever task is at hand.

2. Massage and Moisturize

I know you are crazy busy. I am, too. And I know that I tend to want to jump out of the shower in the morning, dry myself off as quickly as I can, and rush to get dressed. But, I’ve trained myself to spend an extra 10 minutes, indulging in my favorite potions and lotions. It’s great for relaxing before a sure-to-be hectic day, and it will keep you looking younger, longer. Total win-win. 

First, do your facial skin-care routine. I used to just moisturize and go—I never invested in lots of serums, toners, and masks. But, that has all changed now, my friends. I am a subscription box junkie, and now my beauty kit is overflowing with fabulous concoctions. And, I don’t even notice the small amount of money I spend on them—the value far outweighs the costs! And let me tell you, I see a huge difference in the my skin. Huge! 

Next, it’s time to pamper the rest of your body. If you don’t have any special body lotions around, use a natural lotion such as organic coconut oil or avocado oil, and rub it mindfully into your arms and shoulders, and legs. Spread the cream or oil gently and thoroughly and use your hands to massage over your body across areas that you might not realize are aching. You might come across some sudden sore spots, it’s important to focus on those for a moment, rubbing in the lotion. You will be relaxed and energized and your skin will benefit greatly from the extra moisturizing.

3. Drink 2 Additional Glasses of Water Per Day

Water is that little magic potion we all too often ignore: it relieves fatigue, clears skin, detoxes your body, improves digestion, and prevents cramps. And yet we often forget to hydrate, or hydrate so little we get headaches as a result. Not only will drinking two glasses of water help you hydrate, it will also give you much-needed time to get away from your technological devices and focus on your surroundings.

Self Care Drink More Water

Drink the water slowly and savor the break from you work before you dive back into it. Take it in slow sips, and be sure to follow this tip regularly to met your daily requirement of H2O. 

Not a big water fan? I used to hate water. I know that sounds weird, but I did. But for people who don’t like water, you are just not used to drinking it. You have to condition yourself by drinking water several times a day, every day.

And, I was terrible at remembering to drink it. I invested in a 25 ounce Swell bottle, that I now remember to take with me every day. I got the big one, and I fill it up every morning, and I don’t allow myself to go to bed until I’ve consumed every last drop. It helps to add in a little squeeze of fresh lemon or lime to add a touch of flavor. Sometimes, I add in fresh mint leaves, too. It’s so refreshing. 

4. Play with your pet or go for a walk

Whether it’s a furry friend or a tank full of fish, scientists have proven the health benefits of animals at every turn. A pet of your own means a faithful companion. And, spending time with a pet is a proven way to lower blood pressure and increase oxytocin levels.

The enjoyment from pets can be calming and repetitive motion of petting your companion (or even staring at a fish tank!) will help soothe you. Don’t have a pet? Go for a walk to your local dog park; just taking in the sights of other dogs and animals has the same impact on your wellbeing. 

5. Phone a Friend, you Chatty Cathy, You


At a time where connectivity options are abundant, it’s funny how disconnected we actually are. The troubles of everyday life can be exhausting and drain us of all the time and will to socialize beyond what is absolutely necessary. During our free time there are personal things we need to tend to that make socializing take a back seat. But to truly care for ourselves, we need to nurture social and emotional aspects as well.

While it’s easy to pick up your phone and send a text, take ten minutes out of your day to chat with a friend or family member. You benefit just as much as they do. Simply talk about your day and maintain the feeling of being connected. Your support system can help relieve stress and help you to maintain a healthy mindset through your shared bond.

Self care isn’t just about facials, eating your greens and getting your hair done. It’s also about the soul food that fuels you and the small things that make big impacts on your overall wellbeing. By practicing these 5 tips, you get to spend a handful of minutes away from whatever it is you do each day and you get to separate yourself from the chaos and stress of your daily life.

Do you practice some sort of self care? Share with us below, and give us some fresh ideas. Or, head on over to Instagram and tag your self care pics or stories with #40yearflip.

This post may be sponsored or contain affiliate links, which means I may receive a small commission, at no cost to you, if you make a purchase through a link. See my full disclosure here.





Why You Should Focus on Mindset if You Want to Be Happier

Why should you focus on your mindset if you want to flip your life?

Too often we are focused on our external circumstances when we think about being happier. We will be happier when we get the kitchen renovated, get that promotion at work, or finally lose the extra fifteen pounds from that last pregnancy nine years ago. But, the truth is, none of those things have the power to make people happy. Instead, we just need to flip our thinking—aka our mindset! Only by focusing on your mindset can you feel happier.

focusonmindset.jpg

 

Your mindset has profound effects on everything: self-esteem, health, relationships, and careers. Your mindset is even more powerful than your circumstances in setting the course of your life, and in terms of how happy and content you feel.  Unlike random circumstances, mindset is something you can learn to control and change. With some specific activities and intentions, you can radically flip your reactions to common experiences in your life.

 

But, as with any change, it’s tough. Every day we have to scroll though endless bad news in our social media feeds, or yet another natural disaster somewhere in the world. But what affects us even more is that nagging voice in our heads that are constantly whining, “I’m so tired,” “I’m fat,” “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

 

And when you feel crappy, you radiate crappy, and you attract crappy. I’m sure you’ve heard of the Law of Attraction, that law that says your negative mindset will just keep attracting more negativity in your life. Well, it’s true. And once you focus on your mindset, you’ll see just how powerful the Law of Attraction is. So, stop using it against you, and start using it as your tool to flip your life.

 

Sadly, we often miss seeing the wonderful things in our life.  You know the old saying, “Stop and smell the roses.” Well, do you? I mean seriously, do you? How often do you take a walk and truly appreciate nature? Watching the sunrise or the sunset is an awe-inspiring thing. It’s 100% free, and it happens Every. Single. Day. And yet, we miss it.

Why is it so damn hard to stay in that happy, positive place?

Journaling is a great way to focus on mindset

Journaling is a great way to focus on mindset

 

Because thought patterns are learned, and once they are ingrained in your mind, your mind tries to keep you in that space. The more you allow yourself to repeat negative thoughts, the more ingrained these thoughts become in your mind, and the harder it is to flip those thoughts and your mindset. If you want to flip your life, you must focus on your mindset so that you can be happier and more content. And they way to do that is to train your brain. If you want a fit body, you need to train. If you want a fit mind, you need to train, as well.

 

But how? Well, I’m glad you asked. I’ve created a super-simple, 5-Day 40yearflip Mindset Challenge to get you flipping that mindset from negative to positive. It’s easy and painless, and totally FREE. And, it’s designed to make it easy for you to start focusing on mindset and actively working to flip that mindset from negative to positive.


If you want to create great things in your life, then you have to start by expecting yourself to achieve great things. Ready?  Let’s do this! Click on the link below to join, and an email from me will zoom straight to your inbox.